Sunday, February 6, 2011

2010 Reflection

     My mom always told me that keeping a journal and recording your life would come in handy when you were older. She always said that once you looked back and read your old journals, you could see how you grew over time, what you life was like, how funny or bratty you were, and how change affected you. I have never really been great at keeping a journal current, and now I realize that my blog has also fallen into that sad category of "I'll get to it", "I don't have time", and "I'll never read it again anyway".

    However, seeing as to it is a new year, I figured that blogging more often, and writing in my journal for that matter would be wise, because quite frankly I want to see how I've changed over time, how bratty or funny I was, and what the change has done to me. So, the first step was to look back at all of my posts on my blog. Last year SUCKED. I have a few significant poetry entries that are exempt of last year, but I am realizing that I didn't really do anything of value, and not only was there no evidence of notable change in my life, but rather my posts showed that all I really blogged about was the sad things that happened to me, the things that stressed me out, and my family events that I blogged about only showed the bare minimum of how eventful they were! Even my poetry was associated with a bad memory. Then, I looked back in my journal. Once again, my journal entries all revolved around my hardships with my mom, my many boy issues, and my constant attempts to show dominion over my equally stubborn sisters. 

This year will be different.

I am no longer worried about my relationship with my mother, in fact I get along with my mother quite well these days, and she has helped me over the passed months so much that I owe her more now than I ever have. My relationship with my sisters has also been better. My little sister is my bosom buddy! We hang out more than we ever did, and she is even slowing hanging out with my best friends. I'm not in school, which I realized was stressing me out because I didn't really have the money to go, and even though it was sort of a good change for me, I realized that Its not smart to go unless I plan on getting amazing grades, and having a job that will support me enough to set aside the proper study time. I will go back, I just need to make sure that I am ready and well prepared financially. Also, I am not worried about boys! FINALLY! I realized that I need to get to know myself and figure out what I want to do, and who I want to become before I worry about ANYTHING to do with a guy. Besides, nobody has really sparked my interest in a long time.

2011, has been remarkable so far. 

I found a new job!
 I now work normal hours, at a job that pays more than just 2.33 per hour.
 Because I found a new job, I no longer have the need for the other one. After 6 years of serving, 3 of which were spent at Los Hermanos, I have turned in my aprons, ugly black skirts, and stinky sneakers. (I kept the shirts for obvious beneficial reasons)
All the single ladies?
I'M SINGLE! and its great.
I haven't had ONE DROP of soda since December 31st 2010
I work out everyday.
My spirit is stronger than it has ever been.
I am seriously going to have a great body by summer..I even posted babes in bikini's in my room for motivation. (I realize that this may or may not raise lesbian suspicions by my friends who enter my room, or my mother who may or may not already be thinking that me as well as my sister have turn toward the dark side.?
I finally know what I want to do! One of the only good things that came out of last year was finally realizing my desire to help animals. I'm not a crazy animal activist, however I do believe that animals should be loved, and not abused, and despite my obvious obsession with animal cops on animal planet, I still eat meat. But coming to that decision took so long! also, I am excited to see where this decision takes me, which as of right now is still in the direction of horses...but come on, who wouldn't want to help kittens and puppies too!
My friends are still amazing. 
and still around.
Something that I never thought would last with all the marriages going on. I am however missing a little red flavor in my life. (you know who you are)
THIS SUMMER IS GOING TO BE LEGIT. I can feel it in my bones...haha and if I stay in the great place that I live now, than the party potential could be endless.
Music lives on! there is such good music out right now, and I'm bursting at the seems with new bands and lists of music I need to get!

All in all, My new years resolution is to be everything! work harder, play harder, try harder, and succeed. I want to be better at a lot of things this year! Besides, its not like it's going to be hard, nothing can get any worse than last year right? I'm excited to stay motivated, blog more, read more, write more and party harder than I ever have.

Who's with me?